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Category Archives: Life & It’s Importance

Journey from Nowhere to NOW HERE


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.

I feel so fortunate and happy  to say that, all I am today is by adding a little space in my life to “ I am NOWHERE” to make “I am NOW HERE”. Along with my parents, I made myself as a footpath to make me reach what I am Today.  When I started facing the world of opportunities with obstacles, I am very well aware that being challenged in life is inevitable, being defeated is optional. A hungry stomach during my childhood, empty pocket during my school/college days, painful treatment from trusted ones and broken heart in every phase of my life taught the great life lessons and turned me into the person who i should actually be i.e. what I am Today..

The journey that I have been making did not started in a high-end car but more like on IMG_20191103_061339 bicycle. Its a very very special journey from a village kid who is Milk Vendor( person who used to sell MILK by going to each house) to Quality Control Manager in London,  developing teams, implementing effective QA Practices. Its true. I never feel shy to say where I started and where are my roots are. By considering my current position or traits or appearance, many assume that I am from a High end family, who´s born with Silver spoon. Which is not correct. In each step of my Life I faced obstacles, hurdles, ill-treatments from society for being born in low class, caste family, but I let nothing to distract me from reaching my goals.

It started my journey like others from a very poor rural set up ,having no support or idealism to follow. It started like a lonely leaf in the whirl pool. I am born in a below middle class family with only moral values not money.  As a very small child I don’t remember too much other than ethics, moral, values taught by my parents and the painful childhood experienced in various forms. The things that I do remember were seen through a child’s eyes that has made me the person that I am today and I will always have those memory’s with me until my last breath on this earth.

My parents are not educated, they are able to teach me only moral values to live proper life, with which i started my life’s journey. Due to economical situation of family, my parents requested my sisters to give-up their dream of becoming Engineer, Doctor to see me and my brother as Software Engineers. Seen many highs and lows. Faced many failures enjoyed many success. In my small journey learned few but important things. Most of them are taught by parents, teachers/faculty, my girlfriends, brother, family of friends.

Today, I proudly say, I have forgotten my struggles in life to exist but could not forget the pleasure in coming out with flying colors from all sufferings. With successful Computers Graduation and Post-graduation as a topper at college, University levels, I could impart my knowledge, experience and expertise to thousands of students, employees across countries inform of Guest Lectures, Trainings and through my writings in form of books, articles and websites. Most of my students are now established in various countries. But most surprising and happiest fact is that they acknowledge my contribution in their carrier even today .

I believe in these lines..

“If you learn from your experiences, you are an intelligent, if you learn from experiences of others you are a Genius”
“It doesn’t whom you choose as a role-model in life, but before you leave this world, you should become a role-model even to a person”
“I am not sure if I am going to be with you till my last breath, but for sure my words & moments you spent with me are going to be with you till your last breath”
“Its better to die on your feet, than to live on your knees”

I have had my own share of highs and lows.I am thankful for what I have. I can´t say that I have always been very mature about the way I have handled the highs and lows. I have had my bouts of arrogance when I flew high and then bouts of low morale when things went badly. Life however did teach me that nothing ever lasts…not the good times, and definitely not the bad. I have therefore learnt to take things as they come and never to give-up irrespective obstacles in the journey. This has been my biggest learning.

I think what makes my life exciting are not the right things but the mistakes.. Things that I should not have done, things that I should have done in better way. I have learnt from my mistakes no matter how I clichéd it sounds.. I have made mistakes but they played their part in making me what I am today. I am happy to be me. I do not wish to live anyone else’s life. I will keep on learning from my life. But at the age of late 30´s, I think I am a grown up person and ready to commit more mistakes in the coming future.. 😉 of course the new ones as per this generation..

Here are few lines to People, Who…

Who looks at the world from a different perspective.
Who still believes in his or her dreams.
Who see life as living thing and life worth living.
Who do not settle for low.

For everyone who strives for change.
For everyone who doesn’t accept the way things work today.
For everyone who don’t accept the status quo.
This is for the ones who challenge the challenges.

This is for the ones who break down existing barriers.
For the ones make the impossible possible.
For the ones most people would call crazy.
This is for people just like you and me…

Life is a journey with many ups and downs, twists and turns, joys and heartaches.
When the down times and heartaches come, you need to remember they are not your final destination–they are just part of the journey.

Giving up may seem like the easiest thing to do, when your life appears to be falling apart, but it is hardest and worst thing you can do to sit in the rubble of your shattered dreams. You need to not see your current failures and hardships as your final destination, because they are not!  The easiest and best thing for you to do is to take several deep breaths and take steps to keep moving on. One step at a time is the only way to move through and put some space between where you are and where you belong!

Perhaps you have been longing to arrive at your destination, reach your goals and declare yourself “Now Here,” only to suffer a mighty setback and feel like you have actually arrived at “nowhere!” There is hope! You need to keep moving forward, keep pressing on toward the goal, keeping your eyes focused and having faith that you are loved more than you can possibly imagine. By taping into that love, you will find the strength and hope to continue through the difficulties.

Everybody can add that little space in their life to NOWHERE and make NOW HERE!
It doesn’t matter where did you start..
or how old or how young you are.
or how much or how little money you have.
or what your current job is or where you work.
or how big or small your mortgage is.
or do you possess luxurious cars or commute by bicycle.
or in which country you live.
The only thing that matters in Where you are going to End and How.
Life can be a rocky road; the challenge is not to let it grind you into dust, but to polish you into brilliant gem.

Life sure has opened it’s cards one by one. It takes great courage and perseverance to sail through the roughest of the tides. It would have been a great journey but there have been moments when you question your own capabilities. Never loose faith and hope.

If you will keep moving through your hardships, one day and one step at a time, you will, someday soon, look back and realize the difference between “nowhere” and “now here” was just a little space! Nowhere is cared by no one, but Now Here can command the world.

Please feel free to share your story and any lessons you learned, you experienced, you came across in your life in the comments below. If you enjoyed this, or any other other posts, I’d be honored if you’d share it with your family, friends and followers!

 

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CPR – It Saves Life of a Person & ❤ of his Family


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.

Cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) is an emergency procedure that combines chest compressions often with artificial ventilation in an effort to manually preserve intact brain function until further measures are taken to restore spontaneous blood circulation and breathing in a person who is in cardiac arrest. From School going children to Adults, everyone should have some awareness on CPR.  It not only saves life of person who is dying, but also saves his entire family from loosing the heart of their family

In the present busy and pressure world, everyone is exposed to one or other health issues. The frequent and common thing that we hear now a days is Heart Attack or Cardio Arrest. Its not limited to Humans(Adults, Infants, Kids), we can see even same issues in pets. Its good to know the life Saving Steps in the Event of a Heart Attack or Sudden Cardiac Arrest.

Heart attacks , Cardiac Attacks can strike without warnings. They are becoming what the steps of CPR areincreasingly common across world. The statistics are indeed worrying; 50% of all the heart attacks in Indians occur under 50 years of age and a quarter of all the heart attacks in Indians occur under 40 years of age, according to the data available with Indian Heart Association.

Also, those living in urban areas are three times more susceptible than the rural population. In the light of such disturbing statistics, one would be better off getting to know some steps which may come in handy in the event of a heart attack.

What is a heart attack?

The heart is a muscle, and like all muscles it requires an oxygen-rich blood supply. This is provided to the heart by coronary arteries. A heart attack occurs when there is a blockage of the coronary arteries. This is often caused by a blood clot. Such a blockage, if not quickly resolved, can cause parts of heart muscle to begin to die. (1-3)

What is a cardiac arrest?

A cardiac arrest is different to a heart attack. In a cardiac arrest the heart actually stops beating; whereas in a heart attack the heart normally continues to beat even though the blood supply to the heart is disrupted.

Symptoms of  heart attack are:

  1. Shortness of breath
  2. Chest pain like pressure, squeezing or fullness
  3. Pain radiating to the shoulder, arms, neck, jaw, back and the stomach which be intermittent or last a few minutes
  4. Cold sweats
  5. Nausea or vomiting
  6. Lightheadedness, dizziness and/or fainting
  7. Anxiety
  8. Feeling restless or panicky
  9. Unexplained fatigue, especially in women and the elderly
  10. Numbness, aching or tingling sensation, usually in the left arm, but may occur in the
    right arm too in some cases
  11. Breathlessness or wheezing or coughing

Symptoms of  Cardiac attack are:

  1. Sudden loss of consciousness/responsiveness
  2. No breathing
  3. No pulse
  4. Chest pain
  5. Shortness of breath
  6. Weakness
  7. Dizziness
  8. Palpitations
  9. Nausea

surefirecpr-infographic-12

STEPS FOR HOW TO PERFORM ADULT CPR:

  1. Give 30 Chest Compressions
  • Push down hard and fast in the middle of the chest, over the breastbone, with one hand on top of the other and fingers interlaced
  • Press down  2-2.4 inches deep and at least 100-120 compressions per minute
  • Allow for full chest recoil between each compression
  1. Give 2 Rescue Breaths
  • Make sure the head is tilted back and the chin is lifted
  • Pinch the nose shut and cover the victim’s mouth with your mouth to form a complete seal
  • Blow inside the victim’s mouth for 1 second and check to see if the victim’s chest rises
  • If their chest does not rise, give another breath 

Mouth to mouth is optional, but highly recommended for child and infant CPR

Continue 30 Compressions And 2 Breaths Until:

  • The victim begins to breathe
  • An AED is ready to use
  • A trained rescuer arrives
  • You are too exhausted to continue

Special Considerations for Adult CPR:

Depending on the age of the Adult victim, the rescuer may fracture the sternum and/or ribs of the victim when performing CPR

  • In order for CPR to be effective, the rescuer must push down hard, at least 2 inches deep, on the victim’s chest. Although, this pressure may do harm to the victim such as break bones. The decision to give CPR relies on the rescuer, but physicians suggest that the victim would most likely rather live with broken bones than not live at all

STEPS FOR HOW TO HELP A CONSCIOUS CHOKING ADULT

  1. Give Continuous Abdominal Thrusts
    • Place a fist with the thumb side against the middle of the child’s abdomen, just above the navel
    • Cover your fist with your other hand
  2. Continue Abdominal Thrusts Until:
    • The object is forced out
    • The adult/child can cough forcefully or breather
    • The child becomes unconscious. Call Emergency No(911, 102, 104, 108..depends on country) if not done already

STEPS FOR HOW TO PERFORM CHILD CPR (1YR-8YR):

  1. Give 30 Chest Compressions
  • You can use one or two hands: For one-handed compressions, press down hard and fast on the center of the chest using the heel of your hand
  • For two-handed compressions, push down hard and fast on the center of the chest with the heel of one hand and place the other over top
  • Push down about 2 inches deep, giving at least 100 compressions per minute
  • Allow for full chest recoil between each compression
  1. Give 2 Rescue Breaths
  • Make sure the head is tilted back and the chin is lifted
  • Pinch the nose closed and cover their mouth with your mouth to form a complete seal
  • Blow inside the victim’s mouth for 1 second and look for their chest to rise
  • If the chest doesn’t rise, give another breath

STEPS ON HOW TO HELP A CONSCIOUS CHOKING CHILD

  1. Give Continuous Abdominal Thrusts
    • Place a fist with the thumb side against the middle of the child’s abdomen, just above the navel
    • Cover your fist with your other hand
  2. Continue Abdominal Thrusts Until:
    • The object is forced out
    • The adult/child can cough forcefully or breather
    • The child becomes unconscious. Call Emergency No(911, 102, 104, 108..depends on country) if not done already

If child becomes unconscious, perform CPR. Start 30 to 2

STEPS FOR HOW TO PERFORM INFANT CPR:

  1. Give 30 Chest Compressions
  • Using two fingers, push down in the center of the chest, just below the nipple line
  • Give 30 chest compressions at the rate of at least 100 per minute
  • Press down approximately 1 1/2 inches deep
  • Allow for full chest recoil between each compression 
  1. Give 2 Rescue Breaths
  • Make sure the head is tilted back and the chin is lifted into a neutral, or sniffing, position
  • Cover the infant’s mouth and nose with your mouth to form a complete seal
  • Give 2 rescue breaths, each 1 second long
  • You should see the infant’s chest rise with each breath

**A baby’s lungs are much smaller than an adult’s, so it takes much less than a full breath to fill them

STEPS FOR HOW TO HELP A CONSCIOUS CHOKING INFANT:

** The infant cannot cough, cry or breathe**

  1. Give 5 Back Blows
  • Place the infant in one hand with their face facing down
  • Give 5 firm back blows with the heel of one hand between the infant’s shoulder blades

2.Give 5 Chest Thrusts

  • Turn the infant over so their face is upwards in one arm with the same hand cupping their head
  • Place two or three fingers in the center of the infant’s chest just below the nipples and press down onto the breastbone, about 1 1/2 inches deep – 5 Compressions

**Be sure to support the infant’s head and neck with one hand and arm, and keep the head lower than the chest** 

Continue Sets of 5 Back Blows And 5 Chest Thrusts Until:

  • The object is forced out
  • The infant can cough, cry or breathe
  • The infant becomes unconscious. Call Emergency No(911, 102, 104, 108..depends on country) , if not done already

STEPS FOR HOW TO PERFORM PET CPR:

  1. Check For Breathing And a Pulse
  • Using your middle and index fingers, check your pet’s pulse below its wrist, inner thigh, below the ankle, or where the left elbow touches the chest
  • Check pulse below wrists, inner thight, ankle or where left elbow touches chest
  1. Look For Other Warning Signs
  • The gums and lips will appear gray in color
  • The pupils will be dilated
  1. If No Pulse, Start CPR
  • Lay your pet on its right side, with its heart facing upwards
  • Place your hands over the ribs where its elbows touches the chest
  • Begin chest compressions

**DO NOT give compressions if the animal has a pulse

  • Cats and small dogs under 30 pounds: press down ½ – 1 inch
  • Medium dogs between 30-90 pounds: press down 1 – 1 ½ inches
  • Large dogs over 90 pounds: press down 1 ½ – 2 inches
  1. Rescue Breaths
  • If your pet is not breathing, give rescue breaths
  • Cats and small dogs: close your pets mouth shut, place your mouth over the nose and mouth, and blow until you see chest rise
  • Medium to large dogs: close your pets mouth shut, place your mouth over the nose, blow until you see chest rise
  • Cats and small dogs under 30 pounds: give 5 compressions per breath
  • Medium dogs between 30-90 pounds: give 5 compressions per breath
  • Large dogs over 90 pounds: give 10 compressions per breath

Continue Compressions And Breaths Until:

  • Your pet starts to breathe or has a pulse

**Check its pulse after 1 minute when first starting CPR, and then after every few minutes

The above steps are easy to remember and one must have the presence of mind to perform it when the need arises. Doing so may help save a person’s life.

 

References.. Various Health sites, reliable web pages

Please feel free to share your story and any lessons you learned, you experienced, you came across in your life in the comments below.

 
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Posted by on October 11, 2019 in Life & It's Importance

 

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Divorce is chance to start fresh and discover yourself!


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.

 

Marriage isn’t a love affair. It isn’t even a honeymoon. It’s a job. A long hard job, at which both partners have to work, harder than they’ve worked at anything in their lives before. If it’s a good marriage, it changes, it evolves, but it goes on getting better. I’ve seen it with my own mother and father. But a bad marriage can dissolve in a welter of resentment and acrimony. I’ve seen that, too, in my own miserable and disastrous attempt at making another person happy. And it’s never one person’s fault. It’s the sum total of a thousand little irritations, disagreements, idiotic details that in a sound alliance would simply be disregarded, or forgotten in the healing act of making love. Divorce isn’t a cure, it’s a surgical operation, even if there are no children to consider.

Nowadays love is a matter of chance, matrimony a matter of money and divorce a matter of course. With divorce Your relationship may be “Breaking Up,” but you won’t be “Breaking Down. Many say its not easy to come out of the state, at same time it i snot hard as well. For every divorced one, there will be a person, who can understand him/her in a better way and take best care for rest of time. Divorce is Not Shameful and it is Not the Enddivorce-is-not-the-end

You cannot start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one. Turn the page, there might be a good news awaiting for you that makes you happy.

Family is family, and is not determined by marriage certificates, divorce papers, and adoption documents. Families are made in the heart. The only time family becomes null is when those ties in the heart are cut. If you cut those ties, those people are not your family. If you make those ties, those people are your family.

I am a divorcee, it’s been more than 2 years now. Although it was the toughest decision of my life, not a day goes by when I don’t thank God for the courage he gave me. So, whether it is me or any other woman I am sure she would have gone through a few of these things:

1) Facing the fact that we are labelled. We are a divorcee now and the world never misses an opportunity to remind us of that status.

2) Pity. People will show fake sympathy and pity. Do not fall for it. Things like “you must be lonely na. How do you stay strong? I wish you find someone good. “Do not discuss the details of your divorce with anyone. They will not understand it unless they have gone through it!

3) Judging. We will be judged for what we wear, what we eat, who we talk to, everything!!! So, keep calm and ignore.

4) Curiosity. Our sex lives will a source of mystery to them. So never ever discuss it. They will not believe what you say and will have their version of it.

5) Adjustment. We need to make changes to our personal and professional lives. Eat healthy. Take care of ourselves. Keep ourselves busy.

6) Learning to be alone. This one is hard. At times it gets lonely, very lonely, learn to deal with it.

2b2ab942cd8dda95fb9bfb43d3fe8bec7) Self-pity. We need to stop the pity party. If we do not stay strong, we will be squashed. We are all we have!

8) Faith. Just because we went through tough times does not mean we lose faith in ourselves or in the almighty.

9) Family. This is the time we need to be there for each other. But, do not hold your breath on it.

10) Friends. You get to know who your real friends are. DO not get in touch with wrong ones. Limit relations as men may try to use your situations. Respect and love the people who are truly with you.

11) Dating, Marriage. Date only if you want to. Not because you have to or you should or you feel lonely. Do not get carried away by fake words of men who want you.

12) Be Careful with your wishes. It is time where you have to very careful. Even a bit of support or care given by a person, you will start falling for them. No one comes close without a reason, so be wise in dealing and judging people around. do not take chance again without proper understandings

13) Become Financially Strong. Try to become financially strong to take care of you and Kid(s) id you have. Its the first thing that makes you believe you are no way lost anything in life. Get a suitable job or move to a suitable job profile

14) Keep check on your health. To do anything in life remember you have to be health, so take good care your health. Take proper diet, have good sleep.

Divorce is Not Shameful and it is Not the End… Divorce is a choice and I chose to leave. For me, divorce affirmed that an unhappy marriage is no place to raise a child. It didn’t matter if the unhappiness was one or two sided. What mattered to me most was what my son would bear witness to. I realized that there is no dishonor in my decision, so long as we remain a family. And we have. My son knows that he is loved and he sees a fabulous friendship and co-parenting relationship.

 

For those of you who are divorcing or trying to come to terms with it after the fact, know this: You are not a failure, a jerk, a bad person; some relationships are just not meant to last. Love is not enough, and it does not conquer all, despite what we are spoon fed. The best and truest love we can ever experience is the love we have for ourselves. If you set that relationship aside for the sake of “saving a marriage”, you have failed your one true love.

 

I also realized that I will love again.I will love and be loved by someone in a breathtaking way. And I will be ready for it because I fell in love with me first.

Once the fog from our bad times clear up, We see who we are! What we are capable of. It is a chance to start a fresh and discover yourself!
“Divorce is a fire exit. When a house is burning, it doesn’t matter who set the fire. If there is no fire exit, everyone in the house will be burned!”
Words by Shipra Jain…..

 

Please feel free to share your story and any lessons you learned, you experienced, you came across in your life in the comments below.

 

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Ignoring is Killing a Relationship


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.
 

Dont take people for granted. No matter how much they love you, people get tired eventually. We are all given chances, but never know when the last chance may be. I honestly think one of the biggest mistakes people make is to take people for granted in their LIFE. Parents not always going to be around to help you understand things you can’t understand yourself and they are not going to be around you to constantly correcting your mistakes, protecting you and to guide you. Remember that people who love you unconditionally are so precious! Never miss such persons in life. Many of us take people for granted, like it’s just a given for them to always be there with us. People constantly say that we need to treat life for what it is , precious, because we don’t know when it’s going to end… but same goes with PEOPLE who love and live for us.WhatsApp Image 2019-08-26 at 9.31.58 PM

People are precious. Without those around us where would we be, the people around us make us. People are precious. Without each other we wouldn’t be anything. We should stop using each other and cheating each other for personal growth and benefits. The only beneficial thing in life is helping each other, taking care of each other, showing each other that together we can truly make a difference. Separate we are ordinary but together we are extraordinary.

Every time you take the person for granted, you are teaching them to live without you and you offering your place to others in their LIFE.

Don’t ever take anyone for granted because before you know it, you’ll only have so much time left with them. You’ll be hit with the sudden realization that everything about them that you’ve been taking for granted for as long as you remember will not be there anymore, nor will that person either. Your relationship with this person will slip away from you faster than you know it and you’ll regret every last thing you didn’t do, and every little thing you did do to them.

When a person give, it does not come with strings. They does not keep track of what you owe them. When they give, they choose to do so without ulterior motives. They give because their love and care is genuine. They give because they know what it’s like to be without, to long for and be ignored, to speak and not be heard, to care for and have nothing returned. When they give it’s because they get it. It’s because they know the value in what they have in their heart and they refuse to let the world stop them from sharing that. But when things start being taken for granted. When you no longer appreciate their sincerity. They won’t switch, they won’t get angry, and they won’t be spiteful. They’ll just get smart and they’ll change your role in my life. Because when they give, they give portion of their life to you. But when they are done, there’s no looking back.

Even the strongest feelings expire when ignored and taken for granted

 In your LIFE if you have someone who ultimately loves and cares about you, PLEASE do not take that person for granted. It’s very hard to get people who really love us without any expectations. It doesn’t matter what your relation with that person is and also it doesn’t matter if you are in a relationship with that person or not. Right now, we are living in a world where it’s hard to find someone who will be love you, Live for you, hold your in tough situations and who is ready to give himself for you. So to have someone who will love and support you no matter what is a blessing.  Because no matter how strong we say we are, we still need someone to stick by our side. So please, just don’t ever take anyone for granted, and just appreciate and be grateful for every single breathing soul you have in your life.

Please feel free to share your story and any lessons you learned, you experienced, you came across in your life in the comments below.
 

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Failure is Proof that You haven’t Finished YET


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.

Article by…. Prawin

No KING ruled a Kingdom forever and no Mountaineer who reached the peak of MOUNT EVEREST Stayed there forever. Even our History proves that, the people who reach  unscaled heights are bound to get low in their personal as well as professional lives. Success is not property of anyone or its is not for only few people in world. Success is never permanent, and failure is never final. People may fail in academics, love, profession, relationships, fulfilling their dreams. At the end of the day, you are solely responsible for your success and your failure. And the sooner you realize that, you accept that, and integrate that into your work ethic, you will start being successful. As long as you blame others for the reason you aren’t where you want to be, you will always be a failure.

World evaluate people by what they finish, not by what they. The reason most people do not go far in life is they procrastinate procrastination is the grave in which opportunity is buried. Do not sit back and take what comes, go after what you want. The door of opportunity will not open unless you push. The choice of given up or going on is a defining moment in your life. Nobody and nothing can keep you down unless you decide not to rise again. The world will always give you the opportunity to quit, but only the world would call quitting an opportunity. One of the most powerful success principles ever preached is Never, Never, Never give up.. IMG_20190817_221529.jpg

At very early age of my life, I realized that every single person have battles in their life. No matter what that is and how big or small it is. At the end of the day, you’re your own hero. When you’re feeling low, don’t look for somebody’s hands, lift yourself up and be your inspiration, guide, motivator and number one supporter. Every day we need to give ourselves a pat on the back. Not for achieving something or when something goes well. But we need it when no one is there but only you. Remember, life is not puppy dogs and rainbows. It gets stormy and dark sometimes. And it’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to feel everything at the same time. It’s okay to commit mistakes and mess up on something. Remember, you will always have another chance to make things right.

My greatest glory wasn’t that I never failed. It was that I rose every time I did fall. That’s why this quote means so much to me. If I turn back and see my life, I still can see images of kid from a village going to every house to sell MILK (which is our family’s source of income) as milk vendor. From that stage, I fought every battle that my life put before me. I failed many times in my life’s journey, i did many mistakes, i was insulted by people around and each time I failed, I learnt a lesson. I never gave up and made use of every opportunity and grabbed each of them. After such a struggle, I came to a stage where I am today (The head of Quality Assurance wing for a Software Firm In London, UK. ). Only God and Myself know how many times I fell down and rose every time I fell . I never realized the validity of failure until I realized they had guided me to where I am today. If it wasn’t for that pain, I wouldn’t be where I am today and I wouldn’t be sharing all of this with you.

Today we face so many threats from the world we live in. But the biggest fear comes from within… the fear to fall. Even the most non-technical analysis tells us that the main reason behind this fear is not the fall itself but being witnessed by the whole world while we fall. Many of us work day in  and day out out to top the list of the performers in our chosen fields, and try to make ourselves conform up to the standards the world expects from us.  There are many others who do not care about the world though, but are still working relentlessly to achieve their set goals. The thought of any fall in the way to success for both gives them jitters since it seems to have a potential of eventually culminating in a failure.

I well know, it is never easy to wake up and face the same demons that you left the night before. But is it not the end of the world. You must keep going and push forward. The success awaits those who believe that SUCCESS IS NOT PERMANENT, THE SAME WAY AS FAILURE IS NOT  FINAL. So every time we fall, instead of brooding  over the fall and wasting our precious time, we should rather get up and get moving as soon as possible with full faith in our capabilities and full hope for our success at last.

IMG_20190817_194631.jpgThe fact that you have failed is proof that you are not finished. Failures and mistakes can be a bridge, not a barricade to success. It is not how far you fall but how high you bounce that makes all the difference. “You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it”.  Your success will be measured by your willingness to keep on trying. Have the courage to rise each time you fall, you can either stand up and be counted or lie down and be counted out. Success consists of getting up just one time more than you fall down.

Life is a never ending battle between you and the uncontrollable forces that try to fail you. Life is all about rising up in spite of the ache. It’s about picking yourself after a crashing defeat. No matter what you feel, you have to get up because what remains in your life is still worth fighting for. It is your responsibility not to give up because it is only you who decide for your life. Stay on course. Stay brave and be a warrior. There’s always hope. Again, there’s always hope. When you are persistent, it is proof you have not been defeated, life holds no greater wealth than that of steadfast commitment. It cannot be robbed from you, only you can lose it by your will. People do not fail, they just quit too soon.

So please do yourself a favor, never give up. You fight through the stress. You fight the anxiety. You fight through the pain. You through the insults. You fight all the negative circumstances in your life. You fight through the demons that are beating you down to your knees. Life is full of golden opportunities, every person has a lot that they can do, so start with what you can do; do not stop because of what you cannot do. Great opportunities will come as you make the most of small ones.

Please feel free to share your story and any lessons you learned, you experienced, you came across in your life in the comments below.

 

 

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Dads aren’t moms, it’s exactly why daughters need them


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.

Father, none of us can assume life without this role. It’s truly disappointing whenever some says or sees fathers as just money earning machine or a person who is there in family to control or regulate kids . Till last decade World considered fathers were often those who were left in charge of providing the family, while mothers were considered the primary and only caretakers…However, it is good to know that nowadays, fatherhood has a completely different meaning. Because parenting is not only a mother’s responsibility. Good parenting means having equal roles and responsibilities when it comes to raising your children.

WhatsApp Image 2020-02-20 at 12.04.31 PM (1)A lot has changed for fathers over the past few generations. In today’s world Fathers  are much more informed and involved with their children, taking an active part in the nurturing of their children, from feeding — whether expressed breast milk or formula — to changing diapers, soothing, clothing, bathing, reading to, and helping their baby go to sleep.

Parents are the most important people in a child’s life. They create us, introduce us to this world and everything in it, raise us, help us overcome our fears, have an active role in shaping our personality and creating our own world from scratch. However, regardless of the fact that both mom and dad are an essential part of a child’s development, there is one special bond I think you’ll all agree that plays a big role in a kid’s life. From the moment little girls are born, fathers play a key role in the psychological development of their daughters. In fact, when fathers are present in their daughters’ lives, girls grow up with a healthy sense of who they are.

That’s the indestructible, everlasting, powerful bond between fathers and daughters. A father serves as the guide for a little girl to blossom into a strong and courageous young woman

When it comes to raising girls, moms often get most of the pressure and the credit. Whether regarding menstrual issues, boy problems, or makeup tips, mom is usually the first person girls turn to. I see too many men buy into the idea of ‘that’s a girl’s issue’ or ‘only a woman can understand another woman’ and avoid talking to their daughters about sex, dating, or other ‘girly’ topics.

I think it would be hard to overstate the value of the father-daughter relationship. Young women who have a positive relationship with their fathers achieve more academically. They make better relationship choices. They have more confidence, high self-esteem, and believe they can achieve their goals.⠀

Mothers, don’t me wrong. You undoubtedly have the strongest and most unique connection with your children. But there is something special about the daughter-father bond that affects the lives of their daughters in a truly intriguing and life-changing way.

A father is the first male figure in a girl’s life.

He is the true source of her values & morals.

He is the safe shelter that she goes to.

He is the pillar of her strength.

Her first love.

While moms cuddle us and teach us to be gentler, fathers encourage us to be strong. To never stop being curious, even though we make mistakes. To never give up no matter how afraid we are. To always push our limits. The mother is the one who avoids risks, and the father is the one who encourages us to always try and learn from our mistakes.

It’s no doubt. The family plays a big role in preparing us for all future relationships.  Daughters get to know how to get along with their husbands, friends, boyfriends and other people in their life after getting along with father and brother.WhatsApp Image 2020-02-20 at 12.04.31 PM

So, naturally, problematic relationships with men, depressive symptoms or low levels of self-esteem are often the residue of a father’s desertion.  When children grow up with a feeling of closeness with their fathers in the period of adolescence, they are more likely to develop a healthy and satisfying adult marital relationship.

A healthy relationship with the father prevents a daughter from being afraid of establishing an intimate relationship in her future life. For any girl, love with her father is always the first experience of love and introduces her to what male love is all about. If there is a positive love experience with her father in her early years, she is going to do much better and vice versa.  As compared to mothers,  fathers generally have more impact on how daughters relate to men. That is exactly why a positive father-daughter relationship has a big impact on a daughter’s interpersonal problems and interactions.

Here are some ideas for creating a loving and secure relationship with your daughter.

Begin the Day She Is Born: To create a positive relationship with your daughter, start on the day she is born. Get involved in her life from the very beginning by taking an active role in caring for your baby girl. The more time you spend with her early on, the easier it will be to continue building the relationship later.

Be Involved: The hallmark of every great father-daughter relationship is a father who is actively interested and involved in his daughter’s life. Being involved is about more than asking about her day. Instead, it means finding out what she is interested in or excited about and sharing in it with her.

Teach Her New Things: It is wonderful when you teach your daughter to ride a bike, throw a softball, to read, or even to do chores. But often the best things you can teach her are the things society might consider “guy things.” Skills like checking the oil in a car, putting bait on a fishing hook, building a computer program, using a hammer and nails, or even hitting a cricket ball will serve your daughter well.

Love Her Unconditionally: Every young girl needs to know that she is loved even when she messes up. When she makes poor choices be careful not to ridicule, shame, or demean her. Instead, help her learn and grow. Use these situations as opportunities to teach her something. Just be calm, patient, and loving in the process.

Plan Fun Time: Every father-daughter relationship should include daddy-daughter dates. These moments together don’t have to be anything elaborate. Simply checking out the latest toys at the toy store, going out for ice cream, or attending the library’s storytime are great options for daddy-daughter dates.

WhatsApp Image 2020-02-20 at 12.57.55 PMBe Her Confidant: Many girls love to talk. They also tend to be more vocal than boys growing up. You can build your relationship with your daughter by listening more and allowing her to confide in you. Pay attention to what she says when you are together. Listen to what she is thinking about, dreaming of, and wishing for in her life.

Validate Her Often: Modern culture and the media often give young girls the wrong messages. For instance, it is common for girls to believe that they need to be a certain weight, wear the right makeup, and dress a certain way to be beautiful. But, you can diminish those messages by validating the way your daughter looks. When you tell her she is beautiful, you are emphasizing that she is perfect just the way she is. You also can emphasize the importance of being beautiful inside too.

Write Notes and Letters: Just about every little girl loves cards, notes, and letters. Take the time to write your daughter regular notes and letters expressing your feelings. Let her know how you feel about her, and tell her how proud you are of her.

Be a Great Example of Manhood: The way you treat other women makes a big difference in how your daughter will see men later in her life. Be respectful, kind, generous, and loving toward her and her mother, as well as the other female friends and relatives in your lives. Simple courtesy and kindness will go a long way in helping her know what to expect of the men in her life.

A father should create a safe and protective environment for his daughter not only physically but also emotionally.  A father’s behavior should encourage his daughters to never feel afraid to share their feelings.

The understanding between a father and his daughter is unbeatable. They are inseparable and feel quite restless when they aren’t around each other. A daughter brings out the best father in a man while that best father is busy raising a wonderful girl. Cheers to all the father-daughter duos. 🙂

In the end, it is no doubt that we are the product of those who raise us.

Daughter May Outgrow your lap but not HEART of a Father.

 

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Guide to make Sex Life Beautiful


Each minute of our life is a lesson but most of us fail to read it. I thought I would just add my daily lessons & the lessons that I learned by seeing the people around here. So it may be useful for you and as memories for me.

When it comes to sex, you might be wondering if there are tips and tricks guys want to share, but don’t. Frankly, there is no is no standard such list of tips. Everyone is different, and what works for one guy might not work for another. Married couples who have sex regularly live longer, have better heart health, enjoy a deeper connection, and can let go of annoyances easier.

There’s a common belief that most Men want to have more sex, but is this really the case? Does only Men want Sex. ? Its not true. Its not limited to Gender. Even Woman look  for good Sex. Many women find sex to be the deepest form of love and connection, and many women are very sexually oriented. But the ways that women experience and express their sexuality are often very different from their male partners.

Most men’s minds tend readily to say “yes” to sex. Whereas most women’s minds tend to say “maybe,” or “that depends.” For Men it’s an instant Maggie noodle, whereas for woman lot of things come into play.

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“Women need a reason to have sex. Men need a reason to have sex, too.  But for most men, the reason can be as simple as your partner taking off their shirt, coming out from shower etc. In Simple terms,Men just need a place to have Sex.

It reminds me of one of my friend who said: “It’s not fair, my husband is always up for it, he gets aroused, gets an erection and he is ready go. It never was a problem for me in our first years together but now with our busy lives and two young children I don’t look forward to it any more. I really love him but we keep arguing about it all the time, which really puts me off sex. Can you please suggest me what to do?”

It’s important for couples not to blame each other for different levels of sexual interest. This desire discrepancy, as it is often called, does not generally reflect a lack of love but can lead to questioning sexual compatibility as a couple. The main problem is that the person who wants sex more almost always feels rejected by their partner. They may take it personally and begin to wonder if they are still attractive, not desired any more, or maybe their partner has a lover.

Most couples argue about the frequency of sex; one person wants sex three times a week and the partner is content with once a week or fortnight. However, the partner with the lower sex drive controls the frequency of sex — if she or he doesn’t want it, it generally doesn’t happen. This is usually not due to being vindictive or needing power and control, it’s just that why would anyone want to have sex when they are not in the mood?

Here are some tips for Men and Women who wanna have health Sexual bond.

What do woman and men crave in bed, but are too shy to ask? Here are some ideas of what women, man want during sex. Its like a detailed Step-by-step guide to make your nights memorable with your partner. Make some of these ideas your own—then forward to the guys in your circle.

Find out if the person wants to have sex: This is the most important part about a good sexual experience. If one of the partners is not ‘in the mood’ or does not want to have sex it can lead to the entire process turning sour. Not to mention the fact that it can leave you or your partner with a sense of being violated or used. So, find out if he/she wants to have sex. Some common indicators you should look out for is if the person seems keen on being with you physically, touches you or increases his/her proximity to you.

39159b6b575d2f0e58c92b5bbc85005dGive yourself time. As you age, your sexual responses slow down. You and your partner can improve your chances of success by finding a quiet, comfortable, interruption-free setting for sex. Also, understand that the physical changes in your body mean that you’ll need more time to get aroused and reach orgasm. When you think about it, spending more time having sex isn’t a bad thing; working these physical necessities into your lovemaking routine can open up doors to a new kind of sexual experience.

Maintain physical affection. Even if you’re tired, tense, or upset about the problem, engaging in kissing and cuddling is essential for maintaining an emotional and physical bond.

Be prepared: Sex is a wonderful thing. It’s pleasurable and makes you feel happy. It also has a number of other health benefits like helping you burn calories and beating depression. It’s no wonder that we are the only species that has sex for pleasure and not solely procreation. But with all that fun come problems like unwanted pregnancies, STDs and emotional setbacks. So being prepared is your best option. If you are planning to have a one-night stand or are taking the first step towards a committed relationship remember that you should have your mind in sync with what your body wants.

Choose the location and set the mood: Sex is an intimate act, at least it should be. So pick a spot where both of you will be uninhibited, especially if it’s your first time. Pick a place that is private and has a comfortable place to have sex in. A good soft bed with mood lighting always helps the cause (unless you plan to tread on an experimental path). So splurge a little bit. Remember pleasure does come at a cost.

Approach the person gently and do not seem too desperate: Coming on too strongly or being pushy about having sex is one of the biggest turn offs. So don’t seem desperate (even if you are dying to be with the person), allow the other person some space to express their feelings as well. You should definitely show that you are interested in getting physically intimate but back off if you feel the other person is not reciprocating. Sex should be a choice so let them choose.

Kiss and caress: The first step towards physical intimacy is kissing. Most women love to kiss and a passionate kiss can definitely put her in the mood for some more. Moreover being close, kissing, touching and caressing your partner helps stimulate their erogenous zones which will lead to more pleasurable sex. It also leads to a stronger sense of closeness and safety – two emotions that help a person perform better in bed.  So touch him/her, kiss and make your partner wanted. This is also another way to help quell the person’s body image issues (if they have any), making them more comfortable in your presence.porls7yry8

Have a lot of foreplay: This is where you can either choose to remove your clothes or have your partner undress you. Another way to go about it is to remove one piece of clothing at a time, making the entire process a mystery. When it comes to foreplay, most people think that sex is only penetrative. But the act does include foreplay. Foreplay, as the name suggests is what you do before you have sex. It includes fondling, kissing, stimulating your partner’s erogenous zones and oral sex as well. Make sure you get enough of this in. It is often the most enjoyable part of the whole sexual experience because the two of you can experiment with a number of methods. Tip for men: Women can orgasm multiple times. So pleasure your woman, she will definitely be in the mood for some more and thank you for it in more ways than one. Tip for women: Most men love to be touched as well, so make him feel good. Touch him, kiss him and feel his entire body. Don’t hold back and don’t be the only one hogging all the pleasure.

Pick the right moment: The right moment to have penetrative sex is usually felt and is often mutual. Pick the moment when your partner really wants to move on to the next step. In some cases asking if the other person is ready or if he/she wants more is a good way to know when it’s time. Once you know that he/she is ready, take it to the next level.

Insertion: This is the most hyped part about sex and is often believed to be the only thing that happens during it. But there’s nothing further from the truth. In this step the penis is inserted into the vagina. Tip for men: The vagina is an elastic organ present just below the woman’s vulva (external lips of her genitals). If you are having protective sex, make sure you wear a condom before you insert your penis into her vagina. A number of men get the position wrong and tend to ‘look around’ with their penis (try to penetrate without knowing where the vagina is) this can be painful for the woman. So a good way to find the vagina without being embarrassed is to ask your partner to help you.

Try different positions. Developing a repertoire of different sexual positions not only adds interest to lovemaking, but can also help overcome problems. For example, the increased stimulation to the G-spot that occurs when a man enters his partner from behind can help the woman reach orgasm.

Use lubrication. Often, the vaginal dryness that begins in perimenopause can be easily corrected with lubricating liquids and gels. Use these freely to avoid painful sex—a problem that can snowball into flagging libido and growing relationship tensions. When lubricants no longer work, discuss other options with your doctor.

img_0867Love making: Once the initial penetration is complete, you can choose to have sex however you both are comfortable. Men, make sure you thrust (your penis into her vagina) in rhythmic motions and do it from the hip; this will ensure your woman gets the maximum pleasure. Moving your entire body is counterproductive. Most importantly listen to your partner and your body. Allow yourself to feel pleasure and make sure you take your partner’s pleasure into consideration and make her happy too. Tip for women: Be proactive in bed. Move when your man moves. Thrusting can be pleasurable and even more so when you both are doing it in sync and together. Tell your man what you do and don’t like. Also, make sure you pleasure him as well.

Last few moments: Once you both have climaxed or the sex is about to get over, you both will most probably be in a state of elation. Allow yourselves to be in that state for as long as you need to be. Remember this is the phase where you can choose to hold each other or simply be next to each other. Don’t rush things; let your body come back to its normal state. Rushed sex can be exciting sometimes but if it is done on a regular basis it can leave you feeling a bit incomplete. Tip for men: Most women like to be held or cuddled at this point. Indulge her. After all she has been a partner in your sexual romp. Tip for women: If you liked the experience, tell your partner that. There is nothing like an ego boost after a good time between the sheets.

Winding up: The post coital part can be lovely in some cases and awkward in others. So try to make your partner comfortable. Give him/her a t-shirt to wear, flirt a little and tell him/her how good the experience was. Smile and share a laugh together. This could be the best time to make a good friend or a partner for life. So use the opportunity. After you’ll are done, make sure you’ll wash up. Women, wash your vaginal opening and vulva and men should wash their penis once they remove the condom. Lastly, make sure you dispose of the condom properly. Do not flush it down the toilet. Throw it in a dustbin wrapped in paper or tissue instead.

Don’t give up. If none of your efforts seem to work, don’t give up hope. Your doctor can often determine the cause of your sexual problem and may be able to identify effective treatments. He or she can also put you in touch with a sex therapist who can help you explore issues that may be standing in the way of a fulfilling sex life.

But we have to keep in mind that men and women are wired differently. It’s not only about who has the stronger sex drive; men and women just respond differently and at different times. Women base their desire for sex more on connection, intimacy and emotion; they also need more time to physically get ready for sex.

Please feel free to share your story and any lessons you learned, you experienced, you came across in your life in the comments below. If you enjoyed this, or any other other posts, I’d be honored if you’d share it with your family, friends and followers!

 

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